Looking at the brighter side of life after Menopause
Do you feel beaten down by the bad press 'life after menopause' gets?
I hate it when I hear conversations that tell us our bodies are only designed for our child-bearing years. After that it's all down-hill 'cos we don't have the hormones.
I promise you it's not true!!
In another email I will explain all about the physical side of hormones and hormonal change and what it all means but today I'm zooming in on our potential during and after this potent hormonal time.
Ready? Let's dive in..
I've been in peri-menopause for the last few years, so my heart sung when I stumbled across Alexandra Pope of Red School having a completely different conversation.
“Menopause is the big ego death. It’s annilatory,” she describes.
You can say that again!
Anything not serving you is brought into question. It can be an unsettling and scary process as all our physical and emotional gunk comes to the surface ( think health crises, marriage break-down, career implosion..) but ritual, daily self-care, rest and attention to your inner voice and prompts will hold you in good stead.
But today I really want to write to you about the 4th life phase.
Oh yes!
‘Cos did you know we actually have 4 life phases? A little while ago I came across the concept and considering we are cyclic creatures ( think monthly menstruation, lunar cycle, day/night rhythm etc.) it made sense to look at the big picture.
Here they are:
Maiden child to adult
Mother adult to pre-menopause
Priestess/Enchantress pre-menopausal to menopause
Queen Menopause to death
Our 4th life phase is so negatively construed in Western society as a time of ageing with deteriorating health.
What a joy, relief and revelation to listen to Alexandra's words as she describes our 3rd life phase as a “powerful initiatory journey” to “individuation” and “maturity” and our 4th life phase as “stepping up in leadership to the world" and even better, "connecting to the Soul of the world."
Isn't that beautiful?
It's this idea that whilst we still have our personal journey, we are stepping into our true calling, being of service.
It simply isn’t revered in Western society the way it is in traditional communities. Take the ‘wise elders’ in Native American culture whose wisdom and guidance is sought out by the rest of the tribe.
Of course, we need to work on ourselves consistently throughout our lives and in the lead up to this powerful time to connect with and be a source of wisdom to others by
Letting go of the past + our limiting beliefs of childhood
Taking care of ourselves with a healthy diet and lifestyle
Opening ourselves up to love and wellbeing though ancient holistic practices such as meditation and women's circles
spending time in nature etc. etc.
This is what conscious evolution or growth of our Soul is after all and it's not for nothing. There are great rewards of peace, tranquility, joy, service and increased love of self and love of others - what life is all about at the end of the day right? I'm thinking of John Lennon right now.
But Alexandra reminds us to step into our power, “you can not compromise. You must fully align with your deep Spiritual self..a process of dying to the self you are” and "birthing into a new iteration of self."
This is the menopausal process. The 3rd to 4th life phase.
Deep communion with self and Mother earth is needed. Radical rest & immaculate self-care to navigate this time for sure
Our Natural Cycle
"We have a template of births and deaths from all our bleeds."
With cycle awareness you know yourself more.
When you stop cycling, no longer have periods, "you don't need to cycle anymore, you know yourself." - A. Pope
Peri-menopausal? I encourage you to track your monthly cycle.
Post-menopausal? You can use the lunar cycle.
Again there are 4 phases here. Use this guide as a reference but you may find you bleed or ovulate on the Full moon depending.
Follicular (pre-ovulation) Waxing Quarter
creative/planning/energetic/becoming extrovert
Ovulation Full moon
sociable/productive
Luteal Waning Quarter
intuitive/less energy/more introvert
Menstrual New moon
highly intuitive/rest/reflective/less energy
The resilience you build through cycle awareness is crucial moving into the next phase, the 4th phase, the unknown.
Our 4th life phase doesn’t need to be a miserable ageing process I promise you.
Whatever age you are, you can start right now experiencing lasting health and vitality, fulfilment and satisfaction.
Don’t listen to society’s messages that don’t value you, that say ‘you’re past it’ and so on.
You’re not.
Yes you need to rest.
Yes you need to indulge in immaculate self-care.
Yes you need to be deeply aligned with self and honour your own needs
and Yes you can have a fantastic long healthy life.
Struggling? I'm right here to help you. Find out more here.
Big hug
Sophie xox